A friend texts, “keep it on the DL.” The dl meaning slang readers look up is “down low”: keep something secret or private. In some communities it also describes a person who hides their sexuality in public.
This guide sits within our wider set of slang words and meanings. It separates the senses of DL by context and gives replies you can copy.
What DL means in text slang
DL is short for “down low”. The Black Talk dictionary, by Geneva Smitherman, defined it in 1994 as something done sneakily or on the sly, according to a phrase-history discussion quoting the entry. The core idea is discretion. A fuller description calls it any indecent or salacious activity or relationship kept discreet or private.
Over time a narrower sense grew alongside the broad one. In that sense, DL refers to a man who presents as straight in public but privately has sex with other men. Because both senses are in circulation, the surrounding message decides which one is meant.
| Sense | Typical message | What it signals | Copyable reply |
|---|---|---|---|
| Keeping plans or news quiet | “Lower your voice, we’re keeping that on the DL until the party.” | A surprise or private plan that others should not hear yet | “Understood, my lips are sealed.” |
| Wider sense: any discreet activity or relationship | “Keep the new job on the DL until it’s official.” (sample message) | A request for discretion that carries no sexual meaning | “Got it, I’ll keep it between us.” |
| Hiding sexuality in public | “Can you keep a secret? I’m not super into girls. I’m sorta DL.” | A personal confidence from someone who is not openly out | “Thank you for telling me. I won’t share it.” |
The first and third message examples come from wikiHow’s guide to DL, and the broader definition comes from Queer Cafe’s downlow entry.
Common misunderstandings about DL
Most mistakes with DL come from treating one sense as the only one. These are the ones that cause the most trouble.
- “DL is just another word for bisexual.” It is not. Out magazine explains that DL depends on the person specifically not identifying with their queerness in public, while bisexuality is a label a person chooses for themselves. Do not call someone DL unless they have used the word themselves.
- “You can tell who is DL by how they look or act.” wikiHow calls this a misconception. Appearance and behavior do not identify anyone, so treat DL as a word people apply to themselves, not a guess about others.
- “DL has only ever been about sexuality.” The phrase was originally used for any kind of slick, secretive behavior, including infidelity in heterosexual relationships. A message like “keep it on the DL” about a surprise party is the older, broader usage.
- “DL and lowkey are interchangeable.” They overlap, and Queer Cafe lists “low key” among the synonyms for downlow, next to “hush hush” and “on the sly”. But “on the DL” can carry the sexuality sense in a way a casual “lowkey excited” does not. When the topic is someone’s private life, choose a plainer phrase.
- “DL always means download.” In a message about a file or a link, DL may be shorthand for “download”. If the sentence could go either way, ask “Do you mean the file or the secret?” before replying.
Where DL came from
The exact start date is hard to pin down. wikiHow says the term’s origin is hard to pinpoint, and the early dictionary entry quoted above shows it was already in print. The phrase came out of the African American community, although the behaviors it describes are not new.
The narrower sexuality meaning gathered pace later. A linguistics-focused account by Seth E. Davis in Literacy in Composition Studies, summarized by Out, says that in the early 2000s the phrase came to describe Black men who have sex with men. A New York Times article by Linda Villarosa, reprinted in the Lexington Herald-Leader on 6 April 2004, also used “down low” for Black men in this context, according to the same phrase-history thread. The Journal of Bisexuality, as quoted by Queer Cafe, described the lifestyle as predominately practiced by young, urban Black men who have sex with men and women.
Where you will see DL and what it sounds like
wikiHow says the term is primarily used in Black LGBT communities and on LGBT dating apps, such as Grindr. Outside those settings, the broad “keep it quiet” sense is the one most readers will meet in ordinary text slang. Platform and audience tell you a lot before you read the message itself.
- Private or group chat: “Lower your voice, we’re keeping that on the DL until the party.” This is the broad secrecy sense, and the natural reply confirms discretion.
- Dating app or direct message: “Can you keep a secret? I’m not super into girls. I’m sorta DL.” This is the narrower sense, and the sender is trusting you with something personal.
- Casual commentary: A line such as “he’s been living on the DL” implies, in the words of Q-Notes, that an individual is in the closet. It is a statement about a person, so it needs more care than a plan kept quiet.
How to reply when someone says DL
Reply to the meaning, not the abbreviation. Work out which sense the sender intends, then respond briefly and match their tone.
- Check the topic. Plans, surprises and gossip point to the broad sense. A confidence about attraction or identity points to the narrower sense.
- Confirm discretion. For the broad sense, a short “Got it, I’ll keep it on the DL” is enough.
- Answer a personal confidence with care. wikiHow says people stay DL most commonly to dodge negative social consequences of being outed as LGBT. Reply with thanks and a promise: “Thank you for trusting me. It stays with me.” Do not ask who else knows, and do not repeat it in other chats.
- Ask if it is unclear. “Do you mean keep it quiet, or something else?” costs little and avoids an awkward misread.
When you are the sender, add a few words so the message cannot be misread, for example “keep this on the DL (don’t share it)”. In public posts and professional messages, write “please keep this confidential” instead of using DL.
Related terms and cross-reads
DL is one of many text slang forms where the surrounding message does the real work of defining it. For another abbreviation explained by context and typical replies, see WTM Meaning Slang: What WTM Stands For, When To Use It, And Real Examples (2026) – Slanguagestudio. For a slang term with several layers of meaning and origin, see What Does “Big Back” Mean In Slang? Clear Meanings, Origins, And How To Use It (2026) – Slanguagestudio.
Frequently asked questions
| Question | Answer |
|---|---|
| Is being on the DL the same as being closeted? | They are close but not identical. Q-Notes says living on the DL simply implies that an individual is in the closet. wikiHow defines closeted as describing someone who hasn’t yet announced their gender identity or sexual orientation. |
| Which book brought the term to wider attention? | J.L. King published On the Down Low in 2004, which wikiHow credits with popularizing the term. |
| Do DL men cause higher HIV and AIDS rates? | No. wikiHow notes that claims blaming DL men for increased HIV and AIDS rates are not supported by research or evidence. |
